Happy Birthday Hui Fong!

Assalammualaikum.
As I've said earlier, I have a lot of things to talk about, ranging from past events in my life to heavier topics like Malaysian Studies (read Malaysian politics).

But before it's too late, let's talk about Hui Fong's 21st birthday today! :D
Hui Fong celebrated her 21st birthday last Thursday, on 21st October 2010.
As the tradition goes, the 21st birthday is somehow the "key-giving ceremony" day, where the birthday girl @ boy is considered mature enough to decide on his/her life.

I'm not sure whether this is a "Western" or eastern tradition, but since my aunt mentioned about it too, let's just assume this tradition exists in eastern tradition as well. :)
Thus, all of us will not want to under-celebrate this memorable day of hers.

On Wednesday 20th October, one day before her birthday, all of us have already planned a surprise midnight birthday party for her. And lucky enough, she'll be spending that night in Bukit Jalil because her parents are not at home thus it is quite unsafe for her to be at home alone, walking in and out to campus.

I've started preparing a birthday present for her since last year, yes last year.
It was a collection of our pictures binded in an album.
That night, after 9pm I drove to Bukit Jalil and spent the time in August and friends' house waiting for the clock to strike 12. We were preparing a video of birthday wishes for her and wrapping up her presents. It was quite a hectic scene that night in the house, while Hui Fong was happily studying in another house in another apartment (Vista C) with some other friends.

At 11.45pm, we walked to Vista C and waited in front of the lobby lift. The boys where Hui Fong was with will have to bring her down, without spilling the beans that all of us were readily waiting downstairs. As soon as the lift door opened, we barged in and sang a birthday song for her. My my, she was very surprised. Apaprently, the boys told her that they're going to our place for celebration.

We then went into the boys' house for celebration (aiks, the house was messy! haha)..

See the house condition? Should I say this is a typical boys' house?
Honestly, I've never been to any other only boys house before.

Cut 8 or cut 16?
:p

Birthday girl concentrating on cutting the cake
:)

After cutting the cake, of course, we played some nasty and dirty games.
Nay, it was just rubbing the remainder of the cake on other people's face and hair.
Hui Fong was attacked quite a lot that night, particularly by me.
Apparently some friends were quite surprised to see me playing cakes with Hui Fong. Ugh, I'm not that boring okay..

Almost all of us were dirty

Heheh... Lap lap..

Before arranging ourselves to take a group picture...

The group picture. Camera was set on self-timer mode. :)

Another pose, I was thinking of dragon ball at this time. :D

Us girls.
Don't we look like a basketball team? :p

After the celebration that night, we played Mafia; a new game I've heard about a lot of times before. I was "killed" very early in that game, by none other than the birthday girl herself!
Hahaha...

That night, I slept with August in her room. :)
And while waking up the next morning, trying to tip toe out of the room to perform Subuh prayer without waking August up, I crashed into her fan! Hahaha.. That woke August like lightning. So maluu...

The next day, we continued the celebration at Pizza Hut Sri Petaling.
Okay, let me tell you...
The service was very bad! Don't go there! I rarely criticise openly like this, but let's just not go to the same Pizza Hut again, can we?

I spent quite a lot for this celebration.
Luckily her birthday comes only once a year. Heheh...
But nevermind, I always believe, "There's a will, there's a way"
If I really want to spend for her, I'm sure I'll be able to get the money somewhere, by hook or by crook.
:p

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Just be Honest

Assalammualaikum.

Have you ever felt that that person before you is lying, and you know it but unfortunately you have no whatsoever proof to say you are right?

Have you ever felt that strong, and loud inner voice telling you that person is not telling you the truth, and even when you produce the proofs, somehow they are dismissed? The proofs were questioned?

Have you ever felt that strong desire just to slap that person on his/her face but can't do so because you know physical threats are just not the right way?

Have you, ever felt like......that?

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

*a rant written close to midnight*

Random #1

Sometimes, most of the times actually, I wonder why do I still care?
Why do I even care?

Why would people hurt themselves by letting other people hurt them?
Logically funny eh?

Just a thought.

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Rantings again...

I always have a lot of ideas in mind, wanting to be written. But they are all not coherent. Most of them are just strings of sentences waiting to be tied up together. And I keep jumping from one topic to another, which left me with a lot of topics, incomplete.

I thought of writing on why girls seem to have a very complicated way of looking at friendship especially among girls themselves, I thought of writing about how expensive marriage is these days (this idea came when my mum started complaining, and worrying that her colleagues are complaining they hv to burn a hole in their pockets to marry off their children). I thought of writing how some people tend to let go of their responsibilities so easily but always come at the end of everything, claiming their rights. I thought of writing what my mother said about the cartoon Shrek and Obama, (she wasnt comparing them, really she didn't, heh..).

Not only that,I wanted to write about Hui Fong's birthday celebration, about how I think I'm losing my mind, keep doing silly things I've never thought of doing before, about what I've been learning in Malaysian Studies class, one of the class I enjoyed the most in IMU. And about a lot other things which make my life a life worth living.

And so, having all these topics and many others in mind, I came out with this rant. It proved to be a lot easier to rant and write than think, string all the ideas together, and write.

Hope I'll have the time to string all of them together!
Perhaps I need to get onto a long journey train to let the ideas grow; much like how JK Rowling came out with the Wizardry novel that boomed her into success.
:)
So, a train to Penang then! Anyone?


-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Women With No Morals

This entry was taken from a Pakistani girl's blog. Her name is Raisa.
Do have a read, it might stir some feelings and emotions in you. :)

Women with no morals.

My friend, Rabeeya, told me about a girl in the USA, Karen Owen, who had sex with 14 different athletes in Duke University, and then wrote a thesis about it which she sent to her friends via email. She included vivid descriptions about her sexual encounters and eventually everyone in the university found out about it. After she became a mini-celebrity, she was offered a book deal, and now she will soon be a published author.

Rabeeya: That girl is such a slut! Why would anyone do such a thing and be proud of it? And I can’t believe that people are actually rewarding her for her behavior. See those are the kind of women they have in America; women with no morals.

Raisa: I don’t think you can judge her for what she did. Just because her morals are different than yours doesn’t mean that she has none. Morals are subjective.

Rabeeya: Yea but Americans are always talking about freedom for women and telling us in Pakistan that we need to ‘free’ our women. If that’s what they call freedom, having sex with 14 guys and then being proud about it, then I don’t want to have that kind of freedom.

Raisa: I don’t agree with what Karen Owen did, and I’m not justifying her actions. All I’m saying is that she has every right to do whatever she wants to do. Look, there are all kinds of people in America. I know some American girls who don’t want to have sex until they’re married. The point is that women do have freedom there. You get to do whatever you want.

Rabeeya: I think it’s wrong what she did. She is tarnishing women’s reputation everywhere. This is why American society is so corrupt. Instead of condemning her, they are rewarding her.

Raisa: Why should anyone condemn her? She made a personal decision to do something. It’s not up to society to judge her morality. It’s a matter between her and God. Would you rather prefer it to be like it is in Iran, where a woman gets stoned because she has sex with someone?

Rabeeya: No, Iran is just an extreme example. But come on, this girl will get a book deal out something so stupid. Do you know how many women have to work their asses off to make a living? And this girl just goes and sleeps with a bunch of guys and now she’s famous because of it.

Raisa: Yes, she got an easy ride towards a book deal. But why are you so upset? Rabeeya, we have to learn to live and let live. I’m not trying to preach, but we have to stop acting like this.

Rabeeya: Oh shut up Raisa. You’re nothing but an American apologist.

Rabeeya thinks that American women have no morality. In fact, she says this about most Western women. She views the world according to the way that she was raised. Sex is a very important thing for women in Pakistan. It’s a matter of pride and honor for a woman. When she chooses to have sex, she is giving a part of herself to the other person. We are raised to make sure that we guard ourselves and wait for someone worthy.

So according to Rabeeya, Karen Owen degraded herself by doing what she did. I don’t think Karen Owen made the smartest decision to do what she did either. However, I tried to understand why she acted the way she did. I know that in her society, she was raised a certain way. Sex may or may not be as big a deal for her as it is for me. Just like a Muslim woman should not be judged because she chooses to wear the veil, I think Karen Owen should not be judged just because she chooses to have sex with multiple partners either. Everyone makes personal decisions in their life, and those decisions are based on their own set of circumstances. Who are we to judge what others do?

So, read every line of the conversation and how the two girls differ in their opinions?
What is your opinion then?

Perhaps to avoid being judged, I can't give my best opinion yet.
However, what Rabeeya said is correct too, the Americans (or rather Westerns) are always saying that many women are oppressed, and that category of oppressed women include the Muslims.
But if to have sex with 14 different men, and be proud of it is a sign of freedom, I would never want to have that kind of freedom.

"Everyone makes personal decisions in their life, and those decisions are based on their own set of circumstances", quoted from Raisa.
Well, that is also true. However, should the society really AWARD Karen Owen for the "report" she did? Isn't that a sign of approval by the society?
Don't tell me EVERYONE in the society had the same circumstances Karen Owen was in? Until they forsake the morale of the younger generation?
(society referring to book publisher and people who approve the book)

Perhaps Karen Owen made a mistake, and she was ignorant of it. Perhaps she doesnt know that she wasn't suppose to be proud of it, and publish it for the public. Perhaps she doesn't have to punished heavily for it, but should she really be awarded for it?
Who knows, after this another girl will come out with another "report", "My Experience of Having Sex with 20 Strangers".

This is almost like the case where when a child taking other people's belonging. Instead of telling the boy that it is not right to take other people's belonging and at the same time remembering the boy is still a child, the parents chose to applaud for the child because apparently, he knows how to judge "good and valuable thing".

-AkMaR-

Are You Sexually Active?

For the last 3 weeks, I've been studying Reproductive System in my MBBS course, and i'll be studying the same system for another 2 weeks.

Of course, this topic is a crucial topic in my course of study, and like other topics, there are interesting and killing bits in this one.

However, learning to take history from patients for this system is DEPRESSING.

Apart from the normal history components that we have to get from the patients who come with a complaint, we need to ask another three additional components; menstrual history, obstetric history and sexual history.
And my my, taking sexual history always make the butterflies in my stomach flew around non stop, uncontrollable. :(

In taking sexual history from patients, we always need to be "open". Almost too open that we can't have our own stand; in order to make us unbiased, and put the patient's best interest in heart.

Being open by accepting that this patient sitting before us might be having STDs due to free sexual life, might be having multiple sex partners, might be homosexual etc. And to these patients, we must not be judgmental and critical. We must accept that for what they are, treat them as best as we can, and let them go.
I understand the respecting other people's personal life part, and I understand that we must not treat people badly, no matter what their stand is.
Even Prophet Muhammad PBUH treated the non-muslims with respect and sincerity; and he even prayed that these people who are making life on earth hard for him, be blessed with the KNOWLEDGE.
So, being open in that sense, accepting that patient in front of me, is not so much of a pain.
Although I have to admit I can't bring myself to like that patient who is proud to have multiple sex partners in front of me.

But it is more depressing when it comes to dealing with married patients. We must always always not assume that they have only one sexual partner i.e their spouse. We're taught that married people may not be faithful to their partner, and that is almost a norm. It has even come to a point that we can choose whether to see an extra-marital affair as "fortunate" or "unfortunate".
I believe readers know what is meant by that. Ugh.. Scary..

Is the situation really becoming this serious? In this Eastern culture at least?
Or, are we trying to imitate, import and adapt to this infiltrating Western cultures, blindly?
Are we actually preparing ourselves to handle this kind of problem or, are we actually teaching our people to HAVE this kind of problem?

I don't know the real situation out there. How many married couples are unfaithful to each other, I don't know.
But, to think of it as almost a norm, makes me wanna puke.

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Yeay! Gaza! Gaza!

Assalammualaikum. Since I'm not too keen in writing about my own life right now, let's talk about something else!

Viva Palestina Malaysia (VPM), for the first time, had joined the Viva Palestina Land Convoy to Gaza. And this time, there are 12 Malaysian volunteers including TWO ladies participating in the convoy. 7 of them represented Aqsa Sharif, which is also a part of VPM. :)

The convoy members are:

1) Azra Banu
2) Siti Azura Nordin
3) Dato' Dr Musa Mohd Nordin
4) Dato' Adnan Mohd Tahir
5) Mohd Faisal Mohd Idrus
6) Abdul Wahab Yahya
7) Mohd Zin Kandar
8) Mohd Yusuf Ahmad
9) Norazmi Talib
10) Mohd Taupek bin Abdul Rahman
11) Azmi Katiman
12) Rofazlin Jusoh

The last 7 people are activists from Aqsa Sharif.

10 of the convoy heroes departed earlier, on 15th Sept 2010 on two different flights while the other two (Dato Dr Musa and Dato Adnan) joined the convoy on 5th Oct 2010, when the convoy is in Damascus, Syria. (I just got to know Damascus = Damsyik, heh..)

Azura and Azra. Our iron-ladies from Malaysia! Hats off to them!
:)

The close to 30-days journey started from London on the morning of 18th Sept 2010, and the convoy will be driving across Europe before entering Gazaz via Egypt.

For the convoy, each vehicle filled with aid cost RM55, 000 and Malaysians have generously contributed 6 vehicles with Federation of Islamic Medical Associations (FIMA) and IMAM sponsored one vehicle, another local pharmaceutical company sponsored another two, and Aqsa Sharif sponsored another three. Wow, Malaysians!

The convoy will be taking the route to Gaza through France, Italy, Greece, Turkey, Syria, Egypt and God willing into Gaza, and today, 10th Oct 2010, they are scheduled to set foot on Gaza. But of course, as expected, the convoy faced challenges being delayed along the way.

Since Malaysia sent 6 trucks, our two iron-ladies are driving trucks all the way during the convoy! Imagine 20 hours of driving, a truck! My leg will have jellied I think. :p

Ms Azra focusing on the road.

Ms Azura :)

Of the volunteers from Malaysia, two of them have their own personal blog, which I honestly have to admit that I can't read regularly, can't seem to keep up with their posts. But, from what I've gathered, the convoy is now in Latakia, Syria, camping to wait till they are permited to enter Egypt and, with God will, enter Gaza (through Rafah, I think).

They were given very warm welcome from the Turkish in Istanbul, Kayseri and some other parts in Turkey I can't remember. Remember the bloody killings of the volunteers in Mavi Marmara? Most of the martyrs are Turkish? That possibly explains the warm welcome and appreciation gestures of the Turkish, apart from the fact that they too want to see a better future for the Palestinians.

However, there was one day, written in the volunteer's blog, that they were locked outside their camping site! Apparently they went off for campaigns, roadshows and when they got back, the camping site was locked! OMG... Could that be the one of the ways people use to make things more difficult for them? Or perhaps we should be thinking positively, "husnuzon" (not really sure of the spelling); perhaps someone accidentally locked the gates.

One of the excerpt from the blog,

During one of the speeches, George Galloway, founder of Viva Palestina, mentioned that we soon will be traveling using the same sea route Mavi Marmara used and when we reached the exact spot of the attack, we will throw flowers etc as a gesture of remembrance of the innocent and kindhearted humanitarian activists who were murdered there.

Hopefully, the tragedy that happened to the flotilla will not hit this convoy. Amin.

This convoy now is bringing 10 Million Dollars (i think it's USD) worth of medical aid and also an appeal to the Egyptian govt to let the convoy thru to deliver the humanitarian aid. There were approximately 160 trucks joining the convoy! We have trucks from Russia, Manchester, Liverpool, Algeria, Turkey, New Zealand, Jordan, Ireland and many other countries! This is an international convoy, led by activists and commoners. This should work, they should be able to enter Gaza. But then, why not yet? Even my youngest brother asked me, "Why then, can't they win? Why then, are the Zionists still prisoning the Palestinians? In front of everyone's eyes"
And to that, I have no answer. Maybe we haven't do enough. Maybe, God want to give the Palestinians the pleasure of defending their own homeland. Maybe, God still want to give us chance and opportunities to contribute to events like this. Or maybe, God is giving time for you and for me, to reflect upon ourselves, what have we done to help them so far? Have we been contributing financially to the convoy or, have we been contributing financially to the Zionists to kill the Palestinians? (Think McD, Loreal, Nestle and Coke)

I'm very happy while reading the updates by the volunteers, they really are maximising their effort. Dr Musa is helping in the clinic, with people coming for problems of heavy periods to UTIs to blood pressure taking to him. :)
He's very lucky to be able to contribute to this convoy. May Allah bless him and the rest of the convoy. :)

Since the massacre in Gaza 2 yrs ago, I started to imagine, visioning myself being one of the volunteers in a convoy like this. It'll be a dream come true for me. I have, since that time try to bring the matter up to my mother. What if, I volunteer to go to a third world country? What if, I volunteer to go to a country at war? Or what if.....I volunteer to go Gaza?
And my mum's replies were always, "We'll see when the time comes".

Hahah...
I can really sense that fear of losing her first child.
At one point, I even told my siblings that I do not wanna get married, I wanna dedicate my life to the people in need.
They then made a joke out of it, saying perhaps then I'll meet a nice volunteer there, and decided to get married. And then, both of us can dedicate our lives together. And then, perhaps we can die together being killed. Or so the joke went among us. And we laughed over the imaginations.
But my mum scowled at the joke. She emphasised that she did not go through difficulty raising her daughter to let her die at people's land, thousands of miles away from her.
:p

Anyway, let us do our part, the least, the easiest but most powerful, pray for their safety to and back to homeland, and may the aid successfully sent to the Gazans. Amin.
:)

All the pictures here in this post have been copied from various sources; VPM facebook and volunteers' blogs. Credits to them. :)

Volunteer's blog:
1) Azra Banu's - Azra to Gaza
2) Azura's - Azura for Gaza
3) Aqsa Sharif's - Aqsa to Gaza

Eyh, their name rhymes! :)

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com
Sunday
11.58pm

Mood: Trying hard to think straight.

That Awful Feeling

Thursday, 7th Oct 2010. Dark and gloomy.
Today is the day, that I felt it again.
And I've been feeling like this more frequently nowadays, almost every hour in my life.
And it is not good, at all.

It's eating me inside out, and until now there's nothing I could do about it.
I know that whatever people might say, or try to advise me now, it'll only go wasted.
I just won't listen to any logic at this point of time.
Perhaps I will, later.

I hope, I can leave IMU, and continue my MBBS elsewhere, any other med school.
It's not because of IMU syllabus, or way of teaching, or even IMU itself.
It's just........


Goodnight.....

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Why do Girls Fall in Love with Men Who are Bad for Them?

Assalammualaikum wrt wbt. :)

I came across this post by Marina Mahathir few weeks ago. And I have been wanting to write about it ever since, but due to the endless Raya Open Houses and outings and study and some other things, I wasn't able to type it out.
Honestly, the topic has been haunting me days and nights, almost exploding my mind and brain wanting to be typed out and shared within this cyber world.

Marina commented on this news published on 23rd Sept 2010 (what a memorable date for me, that is) in The Star.


Thursday September 23, 2010

Woman's Fatal Attraction
By YUEN MEIKENG
meikeng@thestar.com.my

SHAH ALAM: Her boyfriend was convicted of murdering her three-year-old daughter but Siti Nurhanim Aziz still loves him.

Siti Nurhanim Aziz, 25, said she was not even angry with Mohd Fazli Azri Jamil who was sentenced to death by the High Court here yesterday for killing Syafiah Humaira Sahari earlier this year.

“He (Mohd Fazli) loved my daughter so much, therefore I love him,” the sales assistant told reporters at the court here yesterday.

Describing the 28-year-old taxi driver as a loving person, she said she was not satisfied with the court’s verdict which found her boyfriend guilty of the crime. It was also Mohd Fazli’s 28th birthday yesterday.

Still in love: Siti Nurhanim walking out of the High Court in Shah Alam.

Asked if she forgave him, a teary Siti Nurhanim said: “I was never angry at him all this while. He had no intention to kill Syafiah. He is innocent.”

Siti Nurhanim is said to be married to former policeman Sahari Usul, who is currently detained at the Sungai Buloh prison for a separate murder.

In his ruling, Justice Mohtarudin Baki found Mohd Fazli guilty of murdering the girl by kicking and stepping on her with his football boots at a football field on Feb 25.

Mohd Fazli kissed Siti Nurhanim on the cheek as police officers led him away after the judgment was delivered.

His mother Norhaziah Yusof, 52, cried out: “My son is innocent”, as family members sobbed in the public gallery.

Mohd Fazli is taken away after his sentencing yesterday.

A smiling Mohd Fazli then turned to reporters and said sarcastically: “Thank you very much, reporters.”

Justice Mohtarudin said the injuries suffered by Syafiah Humaira were inconsistent with the defence’s claim that the child fell off a motorcycle.

Although Mohd Fazli claimed he was high on drugs and had drunk two bottles of stout at the time of the offence, the judge ruled that self-induced intoxication was not a complete defence.

“It is clear that the accused was rational at the time as he was able to drive his taxi to the field and back,” said Justice Mohtarudin.

He added that Mohd Fazli’s act of slamming the car door on the girl and stepping on her with his football boots was unacceptable and showed that he had intended to murder the child.

Lawyer Gurbachan Singh, who represented Mohd Fazli, said he received instructions from his client to appeal against the conviction. Deputy Public Prosecutors Idham Abd Ghani, Hanim Mohd Rashid and Zureen Elina Mohd Dom acted for the prosecution.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Feel free to read Marina's blog to know what is her opinion on this matter. I do not really agree with all the points she raised but still, it's a worth piece of opinions. :) And so is mine, heh..

I think she raised a very important, and deserved-to-be-looked-at matter; the title of my post today, "Why do Girls Fall in Love with Men Who are Bad for Them?"

She pointed out that the society nowadays sees marriage as a way to legalise intimate relationship, which I believe, is a valid reason for getting married. That is why in Islam we have many hukum when it comes to marriage, it can come under Wajib (Compulsory) or even Haram (Forbidden). However, what happens if the sole reason of marriage is only to legitimise that physiological need of every being? Or worse, what will happen if that couple getting married are only capable of fulfilling that need without being able to live together and support themselves?

And these girls (or women) who fell in love with men who are bad for them, is that really love or just a sense of wanting to depend to someone and trust their lives with him?
Man and woman have been created with different needs; and believe me, no matter how much you want to deny that, you are subjected to human emotions and needs.
So, these girls (or women) may just be trapped in their needs, and the men they see in front of them are unfortunately, not the best men for them.

But, as the famous saying goes, "Love is Blind", could it be that these unfortunate girls really love these men? What is love then? Or at least, what does it mean to them?
BLERGH, I'm not trying to be a love counsellor here, just that these Qs have been inside my head for quite an appreciable period of time.

And, when I mention "these girls", it doesn't refer only to the unfortunately less educated, poor girls out there who got pregnant and was left alone to face the cruelty of life, I was also referring to any highly educated girls, who are unfortunate or not, depends on your perspective, fell for a man who are bad for them.

Marina also stated that there are women who knew that their husbands are drug users before marrying him, but she married him still. Why? Could it be that these women believed through their bones that they could help these man, their future husband to leave drugs? Perhaps they saw hope in these men?
I can't think of any other reason why a woman will marry a man known to be a drug user if not for the intention of helping him.

Well, what a noble intention, that is! But what a great price these women have to pay! What more if the husbands are not willing to depart even an inch from their drugs. How broken-hearted these women will be?!

How about those women who did nothing even when they are abused, be it sexually, physically or even mentally?
Are they incapable of doing anything, or have they lost their self-ish-ness?
Perhaps they don't mind being treated that way so long as the husband is there? What more is important to a woman than her family and kids?

I've been raising a lot of questions I myself are unable to answer.
What is there in a woman's heart that they are blinded from seeing the harm these men are inflicting on them, instead they continue to love, and stayed loyal?
What had happened to their inner-consciousness?

But of course, life is never a bed of roses, unless you're born as a multi-millionaire's daughter who have nannies and nice dresses and good friends with good education during your childhood, and die before teenager. :

I do not know where this discussion is leading me to.
I've realised that I gave more Qs than opinions.

Ok, I'm sleepy...
I shall rest my case and call it a day. :)

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Interesting Cute Video

I found this cute video in fb and decided to put it up here. I don't get why Canada was in the Middle East country list but still, this video is chomell.. :)