Happy Birthday Hui Fong!

Assalammualaikum.
As I've said earlier, I have a lot of things to talk about, ranging from past events in my life to heavier topics like Malaysian Studies (read Malaysian politics).

But before it's too late, let's talk about Hui Fong's 21st birthday today! :D
Hui Fong celebrated her 21st birthday last Thursday, on 21st October 2010.
As the tradition goes, the 21st birthday is somehow the "key-giving ceremony" day, where the birthday girl @ boy is considered mature enough to decide on his/her life.

I'm not sure whether this is a "Western" or eastern tradition, but since my aunt mentioned about it too, let's just assume this tradition exists in eastern tradition as well. :)
Thus, all of us will not want to under-celebrate this memorable day of hers.

On Wednesday 20th October, one day before her birthday, all of us have already planned a surprise midnight birthday party for her. And lucky enough, she'll be spending that night in Bukit Jalil because her parents are not at home thus it is quite unsafe for her to be at home alone, walking in and out to campus.

I've started preparing a birthday present for her since last year, yes last year.
It was a collection of our pictures binded in an album.
That night, after 9pm I drove to Bukit Jalil and spent the time in August and friends' house waiting for the clock to strike 12. We were preparing a video of birthday wishes for her and wrapping up her presents. It was quite a hectic scene that night in the house, while Hui Fong was happily studying in another house in another apartment (Vista C) with some other friends.

At 11.45pm, we walked to Vista C and waited in front of the lobby lift. The boys where Hui Fong was with will have to bring her down, without spilling the beans that all of us were readily waiting downstairs. As soon as the lift door opened, we barged in and sang a birthday song for her. My my, she was very surprised. Apaprently, the boys told her that they're going to our place for celebration.

We then went into the boys' house for celebration (aiks, the house was messy! haha)..

See the house condition? Should I say this is a typical boys' house?
Honestly, I've never been to any other only boys house before.

Cut 8 or cut 16?
:p

Birthday girl concentrating on cutting the cake
:)

After cutting the cake, of course, we played some nasty and dirty games.
Nay, it was just rubbing the remainder of the cake on other people's face and hair.
Hui Fong was attacked quite a lot that night, particularly by me.
Apparently some friends were quite surprised to see me playing cakes with Hui Fong. Ugh, I'm not that boring okay..

Almost all of us were dirty

Heheh... Lap lap..

Before arranging ourselves to take a group picture...

The group picture. Camera was set on self-timer mode. :)

Another pose, I was thinking of dragon ball at this time. :D

Us girls.
Don't we look like a basketball team? :p

After the celebration that night, we played Mafia; a new game I've heard about a lot of times before. I was "killed" very early in that game, by none other than the birthday girl herself!
Hahaha...

That night, I slept with August in her room. :)
And while waking up the next morning, trying to tip toe out of the room to perform Subuh prayer without waking August up, I crashed into her fan! Hahaha.. That woke August like lightning. So maluu...

The next day, we continued the celebration at Pizza Hut Sri Petaling.
Okay, let me tell you...
The service was very bad! Don't go there! I rarely criticise openly like this, but let's just not go to the same Pizza Hut again, can we?

I spent quite a lot for this celebration.
Luckily her birthday comes only once a year. Heheh...
But nevermind, I always believe, "There's a will, there's a way"
If I really want to spend for her, I'm sure I'll be able to get the money somewhere, by hook or by crook.
:p

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Just be Honest

Assalammualaikum.

Have you ever felt that that person before you is lying, and you know it but unfortunately you have no whatsoever proof to say you are right?

Have you ever felt that strong, and loud inner voice telling you that person is not telling you the truth, and even when you produce the proofs, somehow they are dismissed? The proofs were questioned?

Have you ever felt that strong desire just to slap that person on his/her face but can't do so because you know physical threats are just not the right way?

Have you, ever felt like......that?

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

*a rant written close to midnight*

Random #1

Sometimes, most of the times actually, I wonder why do I still care?
Why do I even care?

Why would people hurt themselves by letting other people hurt them?
Logically funny eh?

Just a thought.

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Rantings again...

I always have a lot of ideas in mind, wanting to be written. But they are all not coherent. Most of them are just strings of sentences waiting to be tied up together. And I keep jumping from one topic to another, which left me with a lot of topics, incomplete.

I thought of writing on why girls seem to have a very complicated way of looking at friendship especially among girls themselves, I thought of writing about how expensive marriage is these days (this idea came when my mum started complaining, and worrying that her colleagues are complaining they hv to burn a hole in their pockets to marry off their children). I thought of writing how some people tend to let go of their responsibilities so easily but always come at the end of everything, claiming their rights. I thought of writing what my mother said about the cartoon Shrek and Obama, (she wasnt comparing them, really she didn't, heh..).

Not only that,I wanted to write about Hui Fong's birthday celebration, about how I think I'm losing my mind, keep doing silly things I've never thought of doing before, about what I've been learning in Malaysian Studies class, one of the class I enjoyed the most in IMU. And about a lot other things which make my life a life worth living.

And so, having all these topics and many others in mind, I came out with this rant. It proved to be a lot easier to rant and write than think, string all the ideas together, and write.

Hope I'll have the time to string all of them together!
Perhaps I need to get onto a long journey train to let the ideas grow; much like how JK Rowling came out with the Wizardry novel that boomed her into success.
:)
So, a train to Penang then! Anyone?


-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com

Women With No Morals

This entry was taken from a Pakistani girl's blog. Her name is Raisa.
Do have a read, it might stir some feelings and emotions in you. :)

Women with no morals.

My friend, Rabeeya, told me about a girl in the USA, Karen Owen, who had sex with 14 different athletes in Duke University, and then wrote a thesis about it which she sent to her friends via email. She included vivid descriptions about her sexual encounters and eventually everyone in the university found out about it. After she became a mini-celebrity, she was offered a book deal, and now she will soon be a published author.

Rabeeya: That girl is such a slut! Why would anyone do such a thing and be proud of it? And I can’t believe that people are actually rewarding her for her behavior. See those are the kind of women they have in America; women with no morals.

Raisa: I don’t think you can judge her for what she did. Just because her morals are different than yours doesn’t mean that she has none. Morals are subjective.

Rabeeya: Yea but Americans are always talking about freedom for women and telling us in Pakistan that we need to ‘free’ our women. If that’s what they call freedom, having sex with 14 guys and then being proud about it, then I don’t want to have that kind of freedom.

Raisa: I don’t agree with what Karen Owen did, and I’m not justifying her actions. All I’m saying is that she has every right to do whatever she wants to do. Look, there are all kinds of people in America. I know some American girls who don’t want to have sex until they’re married. The point is that women do have freedom there. You get to do whatever you want.

Rabeeya: I think it’s wrong what she did. She is tarnishing women’s reputation everywhere. This is why American society is so corrupt. Instead of condemning her, they are rewarding her.

Raisa: Why should anyone condemn her? She made a personal decision to do something. It’s not up to society to judge her morality. It’s a matter between her and God. Would you rather prefer it to be like it is in Iran, where a woman gets stoned because she has sex with someone?

Rabeeya: No, Iran is just an extreme example. But come on, this girl will get a book deal out something so stupid. Do you know how many women have to work their asses off to make a living? And this girl just goes and sleeps with a bunch of guys and now she’s famous because of it.

Raisa: Yes, she got an easy ride towards a book deal. But why are you so upset? Rabeeya, we have to learn to live and let live. I’m not trying to preach, but we have to stop acting like this.

Rabeeya: Oh shut up Raisa. You’re nothing but an American apologist.

Rabeeya thinks that American women have no morality. In fact, she says this about most Western women. She views the world according to the way that she was raised. Sex is a very important thing for women in Pakistan. It’s a matter of pride and honor for a woman. When she chooses to have sex, she is giving a part of herself to the other person. We are raised to make sure that we guard ourselves and wait for someone worthy.

So according to Rabeeya, Karen Owen degraded herself by doing what she did. I don’t think Karen Owen made the smartest decision to do what she did either. However, I tried to understand why she acted the way she did. I know that in her society, she was raised a certain way. Sex may or may not be as big a deal for her as it is for me. Just like a Muslim woman should not be judged because she chooses to wear the veil, I think Karen Owen should not be judged just because she chooses to have sex with multiple partners either. Everyone makes personal decisions in their life, and those decisions are based on their own set of circumstances. Who are we to judge what others do?

So, read every line of the conversation and how the two girls differ in their opinions?
What is your opinion then?

Perhaps to avoid being judged, I can't give my best opinion yet.
However, what Rabeeya said is correct too, the Americans (or rather Westerns) are always saying that many women are oppressed, and that category of oppressed women include the Muslims.
But if to have sex with 14 different men, and be proud of it is a sign of freedom, I would never want to have that kind of freedom.

"Everyone makes personal decisions in their life, and those decisions are based on their own set of circumstances", quoted from Raisa.
Well, that is also true. However, should the society really AWARD Karen Owen for the "report" she did? Isn't that a sign of approval by the society?
Don't tell me EVERYONE in the society had the same circumstances Karen Owen was in? Until they forsake the morale of the younger generation?
(society referring to book publisher and people who approve the book)

Perhaps Karen Owen made a mistake, and she was ignorant of it. Perhaps she doesnt know that she wasn't suppose to be proud of it, and publish it for the public. Perhaps she doesn't have to punished heavily for it, but should she really be awarded for it?
Who knows, after this another girl will come out with another "report", "My Experience of Having Sex with 20 Strangers".

This is almost like the case where when a child taking other people's belonging. Instead of telling the boy that it is not right to take other people's belonging and at the same time remembering the boy is still a child, the parents chose to applaud for the child because apparently, he knows how to judge "good and valuable thing".

-AkMaR-

Are You Sexually Active?

For the last 3 weeks, I've been studying Reproductive System in my MBBS course, and i'll be studying the same system for another 2 weeks.

Of course, this topic is a crucial topic in my course of study, and like other topics, there are interesting and killing bits in this one.

However, learning to take history from patients for this system is DEPRESSING.

Apart from the normal history components that we have to get from the patients who come with a complaint, we need to ask another three additional components; menstrual history, obstetric history and sexual history.
And my my, taking sexual history always make the butterflies in my stomach flew around non stop, uncontrollable. :(

In taking sexual history from patients, we always need to be "open". Almost too open that we can't have our own stand; in order to make us unbiased, and put the patient's best interest in heart.

Being open by accepting that this patient sitting before us might be having STDs due to free sexual life, might be having multiple sex partners, might be homosexual etc. And to these patients, we must not be judgmental and critical. We must accept that for what they are, treat them as best as we can, and let them go.
I understand the respecting other people's personal life part, and I understand that we must not treat people badly, no matter what their stand is.
Even Prophet Muhammad PBUH treated the non-muslims with respect and sincerity; and he even prayed that these people who are making life on earth hard for him, be blessed with the KNOWLEDGE.
So, being open in that sense, accepting that patient in front of me, is not so much of a pain.
Although I have to admit I can't bring myself to like that patient who is proud to have multiple sex partners in front of me.

But it is more depressing when it comes to dealing with married patients. We must always always not assume that they have only one sexual partner i.e their spouse. We're taught that married people may not be faithful to their partner, and that is almost a norm. It has even come to a point that we can choose whether to see an extra-marital affair as "fortunate" or "unfortunate".
I believe readers know what is meant by that. Ugh.. Scary..

Is the situation really becoming this serious? In this Eastern culture at least?
Or, are we trying to imitate, import and adapt to this infiltrating Western cultures, blindly?
Are we actually preparing ourselves to handle this kind of problem or, are we actually teaching our people to HAVE this kind of problem?

I don't know the real situation out there. How many married couples are unfaithful to each other, I don't know.
But, to think of it as almost a norm, makes me wanna puke.

-AkMaR-
http://nur-akmar.blogspot.com